It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
