sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
Emergency. I brought a boy home and we fell asleep, but I just woke up to him peeing against my bedroom wall. So I brought him to the bathroom but he fell over and he's sleeping in the tub. Can I leave him there? Because that's what I've done.
Better the hardwood than the carpet, right?
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