I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Randomize
