i fell asleep last night with fifteen animal crackers in my mouth. rock bottom dude.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
Randomize
