and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Randomize
