She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize
