Since when is my name a synonym for head?
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out