This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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