p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Randomize
