Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Randomize
