i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Randomize
