If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
Randomize
