We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize
