that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
