He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
I told the cop it was my birthday and he said "happy fuckin birthday", handcuffed me and threw me in the back of the cop car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
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