Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
She announced her abortion via fbk
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
Randomize
