I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?