3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis