...so i touched it.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Randomize
