I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
Randomize
