we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
Randomize
