god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Hello Officers/Paramedics, judging by last night, my friend is dead. The money in his pockets is mine, he owed me. Please send me directions to whichever morgue/strip club for pick up.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
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