a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
where does the pee come out of this thing
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
Randomize