I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
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