There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
you inspire me to be a worse person
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
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