Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
At the doctor. They're doing a flu test now. He was like "where do you think you got this?" I said "bachelor party. Strippers." he goes "okaaaay I'll put 'other'."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
Randomize