How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
