R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
Randomize
