But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
Randomize
