is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
He texts me "what are you wearing" in the middle of the workday, so naturally I assume he's kidding and respond "the blood of my enemies" #foreveralone
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
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