Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
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