But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
I'm going to write a letter. It's going to say, Dear Every Girl Ever: Take some goddam initiative and wake me up with a blowjob and I will eat out of your hand. Love, Every Guy Ever
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Randomize
