no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Randomize