I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Randomize
