You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
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I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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