You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
Randomize
