The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
Randomize