If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
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