yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
Randomize
