i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
Randomize
