I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize
