She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
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