Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
Answer the phone when I call you in a second. Just got pulled over for getting road head, going to secretly put you on speaker phone, this should be good
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
Randomize
