JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Randomize
