i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
Randomize
