i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
Randomize
