just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
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