Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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