I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
