You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
