This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
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normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
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I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
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