To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
Randomize
